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In January of 2011, I lost both my husband AND my dildo in the baggage claim at La Aurora International Airport. As I was in a rush, I didn't discover that they were missing until after I got to my hotel, and by then I was too tired to go back and look for them. I've had my dildo since I was 12 years old, and I was distraught that I had lost something with which I shared such an intense emotional connection.
In a deep funk, I was listlessly browsing dog hoodies on Amazon when I serendipitously stumbled across this miraculous product. Suddenly filled with hope, I immediately bought one. Being that I was in Guatemala, the package took two and a half weeks to arrive, and in the interim the reality of the situation weighed more and more heavily on me. Questions filled my mind, like "How would anyone even contact me?" and "should I buy a dog or...?"
My doubts were misplaced however, as after the package arrived and I managed to wrestle it onto a coyote that was digging through the trash behind my hotel (I was unable to locate a more domesticated canine), the calls started pouring in. Within three and a half hours I had examined over 150 different dildos, but none of them were mine! Just as I was beginning to question the wisdom of such a vague message, my dildo appeared before me in the hands of a smiling elderly woman. "¿Dónde está el dinero que me prometió?" she said, which I presumed to be a cultural greeting as I pressed five dollars into her hand and hurried her out of my hotel room for some alone time. Reunited at last!
The efficiency and efficacy of this product are truly marvelous, and I highly recommend it to anyone in a similar plight.
As an aside, my husband later contacted me through my linkedin account. It turns out he's now a farmer and living quite happily in the Guatemalan countryside. It seems like life has a way of always turning out for the best in the end :)
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